Thursday, May 21, 2015

#220 Top Ten

Those who have been diagnosed with cancer are aware of the "cancer card" we all carry.  It is our only consolation in living with this disease.  So in honor of David Letterman's retirement last night I present you with:

Top Ten Reasons for Using the Cancer Card

10. Messy house (Yep, no cleaning today, I have cancer)
9.  Boring party escape (Yawn! Time for me to leave because...I.H.C.)
8.  Weight gain? (No I will not put down this ice cream cone...I.H.C.)
7.  Discounts, free stuff, free trips (Sure I could use a new car...I.H.C.)
6.  Upgrades to first class ( I need to be comfortable on this long flight...I.H.C.)
5.  Temporary forgetfulness (Did I say that already? Cancer talking)
4.  Oops, a fender bender (But officer, it wasn't my fault cause I.H.C.)
3.  8:00 bedtime (I.H.C.)
2.  Kids, please call me ( Or I will embarrass you in my blog because I.H.C.)

and the number one reason for using the cancer card...

1.  Headache tonight,  sorry honey (I.H.C)

Thanks for reading # 220 of 7777.

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